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Sep 26, 2018

Co-Dependence, Interdependence, Independence: The Journey of Inner Freedom

When we talk about and celebrate Independence Day in the United States, or in any country, it is a celebration of an outer change that led to people being free physically and materially, and that’s a wonderful and beautiful thing.

But what we’re coming to understand in this work, is that real freedom can never be attained through changing some outer appearance. It is only attained when we become free of the bondage, slavery, oppression, and the repression of our own inner empire, of the ego reigning like a dictatorial leader.

That’s why there’s plenty of people living in a “free” country that are in bondage.  I remember listening to Nelson Mandala, who was in prison for 26 years, I believe, but he had become free long before that. (And because of that, he was able to set the country free.) 

Ultimately, you want to become “inner-dependent”. This is where you’re no longer leaning on the interactivity of the world, or looking to someone else. You’re no longer manipulating and adjusting yourself.  Also, no longer leaning even on your own human goodness or human capacities. 

It’s important to know the different kinds of dependence, as these are the stages you typically move through to become inner-dependent: Letting go of co-dependence, coming into independence, growing through interdependence, and ultimately move to inner-dependence.

There’s co-dependence, where you are not able to feel okay about yourself unless you can make someone else feel okay about themselves.

There’s independence, where you’re free within yourself, individually. You can be financially independent, independent from relationships that you might have been caught in, or independent from your family values and morals.  

There’s interdependence, where you lean and depend on other people and things. You can recognize the value of duality to have other people and other things; humanly you are in an interdependent relationship with nature and with each other. 

Moving into inner-dependence is learning to lean on the Source beyond your own human capacities and capabilities. 

Do you truly depend on that presence within you, or are you leaning on what you know from yesterday? The Bible says, “You cannot live on yesterday’s manna. If you try to hold onto yesterday’s manna it rots in your hands… the manna falls freshly from Heaven every day” – this is symbolizing this knowledge, intelligence, substance. It’s always pouring fresh in this moment.

You want to go back to the well every day, and throughout the day – every time you’re about to start something. Let go of all of your ideas of what “should be”. Let go of your attachment to what was.  Let go of all of your opinions, preferences, agendas, goals, and throw yourself wide open to the power, presence, the love of God – to the Divine impulse in this moment – which is always a revelation, and always new.

I see in my mind the image of Niagara Falls, which is one of the wonders of the world. The water is gushing with just unimaginable power, velocity and volume, and yet it’s never the same water! All of that is flowing fresh and new in every instant, inexhaustibly, but it’s not coming from that spot called Niagara. That spot called Niagara is just an opening. It’s actually coming from Lake Erie, this massive body of water that’s flowing over the falls.

If it was to try to hold onto that water and say, “This is me; this is mine. I depend on this. If I let this just flow over me, I’m going to run out and go dry!”, it would end up cutting itself off from Lake Erie, and it would eventually run dry. Instead, it depends on Lake Erie, and it never runs dry, and it’s one of the most powerful waterfalls around.

The same is true with you. When you learn to have inner-dependence, not co-dependence, not interdependence, not even just human independence, but inner-dependence, (beyond your own thoughts, your own ideas, opinions and preferences) and lean back into that body of consciousness, it can begin to flow into your life like a mighty river rushing downhill without a boulder in sight, and it’s always fresh, and always new.

To support you in mastering this, listen to the in-depth podcast on the subject, where we break it down and put it into real-life practice TODAY. This will be a real game-changer.

To Your Emergence!

Stay inspired!


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